It is about 1:09 am as I write this. Few minutes out from Industrial area police station after an hour of arguing with drunk prison guards who thinks knows it all but they didn’t knew who they are dealing with. How can you arrest someone just because you don’t speak Swahili… I think we are over those days when you would run away after seeing an AP.

Some of this vices we saw in the 80’s should end. They think we still don’t know our rights yet? But well  I found something that can help you to deal with the situation without calling a lawyer.

  1. When you are in one of those “talks” make sure that you don’t look scared, humiliated, regretful, or intimidated. Instead, try to keep your head up. When asked a question, turn away from what you’re looking at (if you’re not looking at the person already) as though you’re reluctant to look at the person’s face. Not a “I’m scared of talking to you” reluctance but a “your face is not worth looking at” reluctance. Answer the question firmly, no “ums” or “uh…”. Don’t let your voice crack or shake, and keep your body firm. If you can’t, then simply explain why you did what you did.
  2. If you get off the hook with just a suspension or grounding, don’t take it further. Taking it further is not fun. Take it far enough for your respect to be questioned, but not for your sanity or mental health to be uncertain. If you are expelled or your parents disown you, you are screwed.

    photo courtesy of

  3. Do not resort to violence. Most police officers will respond harshly to this. You might think that police are not allowed to hurt you if you ran away because you are innocent, but this is not the case. It is often best just to come clean with the police when you have been caught in the act or on tape.

If you did something that has you going to court or trial, for your own sake do not follow this article; it will ruin you.

  • Don’t do stuff you absolutely know is wrong in the first place.
  • Do not blame it on someone else. Being cool is different from being a spineless coward.
  • Don’t overdo it. If someone talks to you and you look over at them with a slight shake of the head, that’s overdoing it.
  • Read the whole article from top to bottom before following through.


  • Try not to exaggerate, this looks really bad if the other person has access to proof or already knows exactly what happened.
  • If you have an excuse that is liable, logical and true, use it. Don’t say something like, “My dog …” or “The wind…” These kinds of excuses are overlooked.
  • If you’re normally the cute, innocent, or naive type this is something you should gradually slip into. Do not dive right in.
  • Don’t use foul language– It could get you into more trouble
  • Do not lie. However, you can sometimes use pieces of the truth to help you. As long as everything you say is technically true, usually people cannot beat you.

Things You’ll Need

  • Confidence
  • Courage
  • Determination
  • A straight face
  • And that is how I managed to get out thanks to Wikipedia.



5 thoughts on “What To Do When Caught By a Kenyan police.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s